When we meet someone new, we are asked what we do for a living. We then proceed to attach our identity to the job that we hold. Many times while this is happening, in the back of our minds, we are thinking about how much we dislike our job or wish that we could do something that we really enjoy.
The activities that fulfill us may not be what we do to pay the bills. Because of this, we often downplay the value of those activities and deny that they are worthy of real time and attention in our lives, all the while desperately wishing that we could spend more time doing those things.
We all contain within us gifts and talents, however, we fall victim to what we are “supposed to” be doing or how we are “supposed to” be living our lives and we begin to doubt those deep inner treasures. We doubt the innate pull toward what makes us feel best about ourselves and give in to what other people tell us. Self-doubt can paralyze and derail forward movement into what naturally feeds our soul. It causes us to stall out and to feel like something is missing.
When this happens, we minimize our own gifts and talents and focus only on what will pay the bills. Of course, the bills are important, but even more important is the feeling that we are honoring who we truly are in this life. When deny that our passions are a part of our identity, we don’t allow ourselves to really feel into being a person who feels the joy of answering the soul’s calling.
If we can tap into what makes us come alive and create the space in our lives for those things, they may well some day pay the bills. But, we must honor those things enough to continue to practice and grow them into something greater.
Even more importantly, we must honor what makes us come alive simply for that fact. If we deny ourselves the pleasure of the things we most enjoy, we can spend much of our lives feeling incomplete, frustrated, resentful, anxious, disappointed, and depressed. And I have met many people who are living this way.
The question “What do you do for a living?” should spark an answer that we are excited to give because it is regarding what makes us come alive. Maybe a better question to ask when we meet someone new is “What makes you come alive?” What do you do to be able to truly live? Maybe we work all day at a job that pays the bills, but then we come home and in the evenings and on weekends, we are able to create art that expresses our true essence.
No one else can tell you what makes you feel deeply alive. That is a message from your soul. Only you can know that. And only you can make the choice to put time and effort into growing it. When you do, you will find that joy, love, courage, and fulfillment grow and allow for more connection, better coping, and more resilience in your life.
The first step is that you must want to come alive. Rather than going through the motions every day, this is about truly living your life and feeling good because you are honoring your soul’s calling. It’s the most important work you will ever do.
If you are thinking that you don’t have time or energy to do what you love, you and I can work on the daily habits that will make that possible. Make the committment to yourself. You won’t be sorry.
I will be practicing right along with you.
Chat again soon,
k